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Sociosomnia: The Super Bowl LVI 🏈

3things jordan myska allen personal growth relatefulness sociosomnia stayinlove Feb 17, 2022

 

“You know what I love about sports? It’s present. In the moment. Humans go beyond what anyone would have thought them capable of.” - Valerie Daniel

When it comes to relating, we don’t talk very much about defense, and when we do it's often not positive. But my understanding is that in this year’s Super Bowl (American Football championship), it was a decisive defensive play (Aaron Donald) that led to victory for the Rams 🐏, and with the Bengals 🐅 quarterback getting clobbered with no defense on his side (7 sacks), that shut them down.

What does “good defense” symbolize when being present in relationships? Discernment. Self-trust and self-solidarity. Saying no. No to our inner critic, no to letting things in that don’t belong; no to continuing past our limits, no to fake agreement, hiding our authenticity to keep the peace, or expressing without acknowledging how much we care about the listener. How do we know what’s good defense, and what’s being closed off to change and interconnection? It’s according to who says it, and how they say it.

For those who watched the game: The Rams are the “All-In” team that represents the energy in our psyches of fearlessly going for it—being willing to take a big risk in a relationship and change mid-sentence, just like the Rams changed quarterbacks (Matthew Stafford) and added key players (OBJ, Von Miller) mid-season. The Bengals are the “comeback player of the year”—the sucky habit you’ve had for years that has just finally evolved into something good. But without defense (Bengals offensive line)—those healthy "nos", the high-integrity underdog in you won't win the prize of great relationships against going "All-In." My takeaway: go all in.

Disclaimer & Gratitude: I personally know basically nothing about professional sports—a running joke with my sister who's so well-informed that she's got a podcast about football (and dating)—so I want to thank Valerie Daniel for walking me through this!

 

With love, Jordan

 

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