To fall in love with suffering? 🏚️

I’m still grateful—I’m grateful that I get to be woken up at 3:45am by my daughter’s fever. And for the “Fuck, the milk is at the other house, next to the floorless kitchen cordoned off for mold-remediation”. But also, “Fuck! We have milk at the other house :)! And our mold is getting remediated! And we have a house!”

It’s not just reframing. It’s not comparing against the alternatives, even the non-existence alternative (“Holy shit, I exist at all, and I could not exist—in fact there seems to be infinitely more non-existence than existence—so every single moment of experience is a bonus”). It’s something I can’t name yet about how suffering is GOOD, not just pain. Something about how suffering offers meaning, blessings, fruit…

I’m confused about this. Buddhists seem to want to end all suffering. Christians seem to really understand the value of suffering in their bones; this seems to unlock a legendary commitment to serve the less fortunate. I think our grandparents knew the value of hardship; even as they rejoiced that their grandkids could live in greater comfort, ease, and play.


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With love, Jordan